For any of you who know my dear friend Sean Rossman, you will know that he is almost impossible to get a hold of. He leads an incredibly busy life collecting trinkets, eating free ice cream, squinting at cameras, worshiping Bono and Bob Dylan, and “doing things”. I’ve learned throughout the years that you must book activities with him well in advance because of his insanely busy schedule. For example, I’ll text him at about 8am with something like: “wings later?” and I won’t expect a response back til about 6pm with a definitive answer. Its just what I’ve come to expect.
Now, you can’t always just come to expect something from this guy. On multiple occasions I’ve texted him during the afternoon, then get a text from him 2 days later with something like “hey man, I just got ur text i was sooooo busy, whats up tho?” Umm yeah that concert/phils game/beer special/etc is well over now, sorry. You lose. Then theres the classic day later response “hey man, saw ur text, put my phone down and got sooo busy and forgot lol”. You busy busy guy you.
Finally, my favorite Seanism, you get the coveted day-after phone call; sean: “hey sorry I missed your call last night, what did you want” me: “oh we were grabbing dollar beers and going to see a U2 cover band, you shoulda came it was kickass”, sean: “OHHHHHHH man I’m a HUGE U2 fan why didn’t you guys call me?”, me: “umm we called you like 6 hours before we were going but you were being all convenient and not picking up the phone”, sean: “oohh so its my fault, you guys suck, blah blah blah”. Then he proceeds to get all bitter/self loathes for awhile/plays the victim card. He’s just your typical victim, all the time.
You will forever be known as “The Big Convenience” or more simply “Big C”. And to boot, you are the biggest hipster I know. You grew a beard back before anyone else was doing it, you wear 3D glasses because of the irony, you have new-age fun with a vintage feel, and you always pretend like you’re not trying…when you are. Douche. Anyway, no hard feelings Sean. You know I love you, but just answer your phone and I won’t blog about how much I hate you. Cheers, budday!